tweet Hawks Win!! tweet
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i would punch a child for taco bell
i dont think my boyfriend knows how much of a pain it is to shave my ass
just turned my empty handle of passion fruit smirnoff into a fish bowl. I love college.
Stalkers don't have time for showers...it's a full time job
Is she bent over a couch yet or did daylight savings time throw off her usual schedule?
The little things make me happy. Little dicks do not.
I just don't know about this life anymore. Quite frankly I think I belong up there in the great blue, lounging on a cloud sippin tea with Jesus
I swear they were about to hook up!!
I know because I was in the tub taking an imaginary silent bath. They stopped cuz I gagged on my shot.
There is a 1000000% chance you'll be turned down if you try coming on to me while I watch Star Wars.
I totally gave him head in sync to Beastie Boy's Sabotage playing in the background.
She sneezed like 10 times, put her head down on the table and then laid down on their couch and fell asleep. In the middle of the dominoes game. I'll never understand why my dad continues to provide my mom wine.
"YOU ALWAYS BEEN A HOE YOU ALWAYS GONE BE A HOE. THAT'S JUST THE WAY IT'S GONE BE." overheard at temple
you guys have a strange definition of the word fun. I would have said dangerous, terrifying, or life-threatening. of course, bowling can now be described the same way.
Being a fine ass woman in a world full of fuckboys is the realest struggle I've ever known.
Randomize
