I thought it was weird that her dad told me to finish and get out after he walked in on us. I like him
she was screaming in french about how classy it was to be drinking wine. oh... she was drinking it out of the bottle. with a beer in her other hand while throwing up.
i googled "the goonies drinking game." i may be alone, but i'm living the college dream.
I just smelled my beer. It smells like coming home.
i got excepted to unl lol
You mean "accepted".
it was one of those movies netflix should have sent weed with
He was waring a speedo fashioned out of american flag bandanas and when he got hard he said "you're such a patriot...raising the american flag like that"
It's such a good feeling to send those "I'm not in jail" texts on Sunday morning
let's just skip the pleasantries and go back to my place for pizza and casual sex
Ya know, since we do have alot of sex with each other i figure i should wish you a happy valentines day
Wouldn't life be so much easier if you could just walk up to attractive men and say, "Let me bear your children" and it wouldn't be creepy?
Or possibly end in a restraining order?
Note to self: don't try to shave your legs when sex-sore. You CANT reach, stop trying.
I will consider it. I need to determine if ogling him is worth almost certain death via zipline.
not that i'm not about exploiting men for money
This is a crisis. I had a huge crush on him in seventh grade and now his girlfriend is due to have his child on my birthday. HIS CHILD CAN'T BE BORN ON MY BIRTHDAY.
Randomize
