your thong is hanging out like whoa
My grandmass entire neighborhood is over for dessert and i'm high as fuck...about to make a couple of freshman boys real uncomfortable
Freshman in high school? Just your type
did you get my message about your dog?
no... is he ok?
no, i didn't see him when i was being chased out of your house. check your drive way :( sry
Three 40's of Mickeys, is no excuse to be naked at Baskin Robins.
my host sister just stared at me as i knocked over the lamp, then took out all my chocolate, walked into the bathroom, and locked the door. i'm officially the worst exchange student ever.
I really need to get laid. I'm telling at least 10 girls that I love them tonight.
Odds are at least 1 out of those 10 girls will be as crazy as you and will be into it.
Careful, it's a slippery slope to discovering you're bisexual...trust me.
Im going..... Drinking all day and hand jobs from 18yr old emo rich girls that are just trying to get back at mom and dad for being to protective...SOLD
Is it frowned upon to puke at Keeneland while you're betting on horses or is it just whatev
You get home okay?
I'm pantless and in bed
That doesn't mean you're at home.
See I would make a great girlfriend. My surprises are sex and burritos. What else do guys want
I need someone to sew my vagina shut until I'm responsible enough to use it
He nicknamed his dick "the fountain of youth" I think it's time to move on...
There are 6 of us in a mini cooper and his maid is in the trunk...she needed a ride.
What happened last night?
Lets just say you asked me a couple times if you had eyeballs..
Randomize
