dude you need to get laid
me?
no, the other guy who hasn't been laid in 7 months
oh I thought you were talkin about me
wait
all i know is that they all tuched my pee cup last night.
My professor just used "labia" and "numchucks" in the same sentence. I am dying.
This guy legit just tried to LSAT formal logic his way into my pants. Contrapositives and everything.
Guy in our group took down a chick in a wheelchair last night.
I may still return these pants. Depends how much they smell like alcohol by tmrw morning. I've already spilled once.
You'd be surprised at how many crooked penises are out there
should my break up email to my English professor be in MLA format?
i know and i thought i was only capable of loving dick and drugs, im so happy
I just think that if you're going to run around naked outside, a feather boa should be involved. Half for the flair and half for an emergency cover.
I'm never drinking again. I saw way more penises than I ever cared to see last night. And I've decided that I'm going to live in Scotland.
I need an explanation for both of these epiphanies.
New BDSM fun fact. When you get spanked hard enough with a flat object, you get welts. Welcome to thunderdome, bitches.
Pretty sure keeping my vibrator in the same drawer with the weed makes it work better. I fall asleep almost immedi
I found Erin. She's getting a back massage from the coat check boy and drinking all his whiskey.
I once broke a mans heart just to get laid by a premature ejaculator
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