I was scared of Debbie's boobs today. They were all huge and scary looking
So...AT&T finally added picture messaging for iPhone...bring on the tits!!!
girl in the front row yawned. double jointed jaw. i know where i'll be sitting next class
You NEED to get fingered by a violinist. He used his left hand and make me cum, he's RIGHT handed.
Once you realized you couldn't finish the 30 you started walking down the street and leaving a beer in everyone's mailbox
so, I mean this in the straightest way possible, but don't you ever just feel like you owe Jon Stewart a blowjob...
I found her in the bathroom licking her screwdriver off the floor. she said there was no way she was wasting a $6 drink.
God, for the last time, no I did not break my nose doing a keg-stand just for a nose job.
I WILL BE THE BEST FICTITIONAL HISTORICAL FIGURE FOR THE FEMENIST MOVEMENT THE WORLD HAS EVER SEEN
So im waiting for someone at grand central and i look up AND THE ENTIRE BALCONY IS FILLED WITH BOY SCOUTS I AM TERRIFIED
Sheila knows I only go down on her on Bastille Day. Valentine's Day we get high and watch The Neverending Story. THE SYSTEM WORKS.
I'm gonna be the best dressed mother fucker to ever get kicked out of that damn bar.
So i stood up out of the sunroof while he gave me oral. Car was still moving. Exactly how illegal is that?
All I remember is an overwhelming desire for chicken nuggets...
Yes, you pinned my brother to the floor by the throat and threatened to slaughter his family if he didn't drive to mcdonalds and get you some.
What were you even doing out there at 2 a.m.?
Look, i had a gallon of lemonade, a pack of smokes and a Darth Vader voice changer. What did you EXPECT me to do?
Randomize
