my hangover today makes thursday's feel like a bubble bath.
handjob tips. give me some.
Nailed a drunk college girl before the CU game Saturday, and a drunk married woman after the Broncos game Sunday.
Some perfection is debatable.
I'm inventing beer flavored vodka. This raspberry shit makes me feel like a pussy.
She passed out in his mom's bed and when we went to go get her she went 'no its cool I live here'.
He wants a "vagina fling" before he commits to dick for life. I'm gonna allow it.
I'm starting to think you fell asleep on your kitchen floor pantless with salsa spilt around you
I slept with him that night and I'm not sure if my lack of enthusiasm was obvious but I found him eating ice cream in the bathtub the next morning. Mom will be so proud.
I'm 11 for 13 getting drunker than the person who's birthday it is
Drank a beer through my butt, how's your initiation going?
Well if YOU HAVE TO KNOW, we're laying across the street from the bar on that grassy hill trying to see who's she's with at the bar.
Unintionally got shitfaced at study group this week. The waitress brought out a fishbowl of long Island iced tea. Challenge accepted.
I can't really feel a difference, so essentially I paid 60 bucks to bedazzle my vag.
I'd like to know who hasn't seen my tits tonight.
So...I'm pretty sure I have officially determined that reverse cowgirl is the only position possible to have sex in my smart four two
Randomize
