Hallmark should totally make "congratulations on getting your period" cards...I feel they would be quite popular.
Regardless, you never quit out of your interenet. You left your porn on the living room comp. Then you passed out four feet from the chair with your hand still down your pants. We decided that we should go back to her place instead. Worlds best wingman.
A guy in a big stork costume just came to our meeting to give us condoms and t-shirts telling us not to get pregnant. Only at college
is it just me, or are high schoolers getting sexier?
he doesn't care that i have a boyfriend so why should i?
logic in its finest
She bit a glass in half.
My vagina senses are tingling. I know your here.
hr gave me pretxwk salad and a doubke shot of grey goose. i approve! tou guys are a beautidil couple.
Congratulations, your dick has been selected to participate in my birthday sex. Please reply with a response.
Do I have a choice?
I am sorry, you're response was not recognized. Please try again.
my make-up looks really good tonight. I swear it had nothing to do with me finishing all of your strawberry vodka.
Still pimpin that dick in the cornfields. Now it's just transferred to the local bar.
Remind me to tell you the story of the fuzzy condom
Dude, he danced with the dog that some random chick was carrying at the bar. Then the dog jumped out of his arms and ran away. THAT definitely deserves a drink.
You know your Halloween costume is slutty when you have to shave your pubes to wear it.
I am watching Wayne Gretzky and Alexander oveckhin play video games for charity. What is life right now.
Randomize
