people and things i regret. that's what i want to do tonight.
Btw the nut in my hair goes great with my outfit !!! :(
I'm going to shit on something weird... I can't wait
he just asked if i would like him to change his diet so his jizz tastes better. keeper? i think so.
you got thrown out for pissing in a cup in the corner. you told one guy it was okay because you went to college and that he wouldn't understand
Lots of rum and cokes. Bartender wore my underwear on his head. Lost my keys. Accidentily started a fight. DC is going to kill me
Did you ask me to bring you a t-shirt to class or did I just dream that?
No, I did. It's a long story.
Nobody in the ambulance liked me...
First of all guys don't have walks of shame. Secondly there is nothing more epic than riding the skytrain in a toga while everyone else is going to work
trying to figure out what happened last night by looking around the apartment.
naked man under the piano. THE PLOT THICKENS.
Just burnt my nuts with a cigarette. Don't ask. I hate life.
HOW THE FUCK IS IT POSSIBLE THAT THE JUNIOR HIGH STUDENT IS BETTER AT BEING AN ADULT THAN I AM!?!?
And a hot pocket after we fucked. Heaven.
he's like the highest ranking tongue wizard i know.
She pulled out a water gun filled with vodka and called it her weapon of choice tonight. She's fine.
Randomize
