you guys were way drunker than both of me
so while trying to be a healthier drunk i discovered that putting airborne in natty is not an advisable decision
winter break is going to suck... i have to put away my college personality and transform into who my parents think i am.
new excercise plan: walk a mile get a bj then walk a mile home
Just woke up. My philosophy paper is a play, and my paper for musical theater is about physics. That's some dank shit you sold me
Its not christmas eve unless I give him head. I wont take no for an answer
I lost count after the 4th body shot but I think I'm wearing at least 3 different peoples clothes.
I just wanted to clarify that I am not bisexual and had no intentions of ACTUALLY penetrating my roommate with a can of bugspray.
I need to find more Xanax, my Grandpa doesent leave for another week and he's made it a mission to get me to come out of the closet as a xmas gift to my parents.
I have to stop envisioning penises as dragons.
Because drinking and showering don't go hand in hand. There that's my PSA of the day.
Letting Freddy Krueger eat me out = HAPPY HALLOWEEN TO ME!!!
Blame the bisexuality and move on?
I'm going to need to invest in some knee pads if I keep having nights like tonight
Do not confuse my plans for being an adult though. I will ABSOLUTELY be practicing suturing, on my porch, while getting stoned.
Randomize
