i was so high it looked like the chipmunks movements were coordinated to that lady gaga song
just saw a guy try to order booze in his coffee at 8 am.
It's going to take a while to see a dick pic that I enjoy more than richs helicopter video
Well on the plus side I have started adding benefiber to my bottle of wine
his face was nice enough, but his choice of footwear screamed columbian drug lord
she cut her forehead open playing a drunken game of pin the tail on the donkey and now she's having a panic attack.
Guys, Black Friday does not exist in the world of dealing. Stop texting me asking what my deals are.
The most humiliating part was that I farted while he was tasing me.
I woke up in Brittany's thong, Tony's shirt, and an oven mitt
This taxi driver is not happy I am in drag
I needed 3am water. Not 3am shots of rum.
Please hurry. I'm the only one here who's not an attorney with a trophy wife.
Jello shots and homoerotic movie scenes bingo?
We need to get me chipped asap
Girl... I just woke up with a bloody mary in a to go cup on my nightstand and two hours late for work.. I'm sorry i can't go out on weekdays anymore. Luckily my boss was just happy i was ok
Randomize
