I took Valium worth by frank. I squabble
Li shadha you vin. It's phot out. I just ate a fried Oreo
He cooked the food on a paper plate in the oven.
you ended the night by relentlessly sucking on my hips bone and hand demanding milk. you said it was because you were a tiger
Having dinner with my dad, watching the news and some AIDS prevention ad comes on. My dad then kindly informs me that he doesn't enjoy the feel of condoms.
he was lying next to me and i saw him text "score" to someone.
just woke up to two already rolled blunts and a full explanation of what happened last night. I love my gf
It's one of the reasons i'm here, along with emotional support, physical support if you need it, and power orgasms.
I just wished the taco bell drive thru guy a happy cinco de mayo. Who says arizonians hate mexicans?
the ball fondling will be left out of the trip recanting
The horrors my penis has endured I wouldn't wish upon any man.
She is high at the bar - she thinks the bottle of frangelico is aunt jemima telling her to stop doing drugs.
Alright, who started the "how long till dereck gets deported from Australia" pool? I want in on that.
When this bachelor party is over and your life is in ruins, you have my permission to die.
I asked if anyone's pants felt wet on the bottom, like a half hour after mine did. I had just peed my pants i had gotten so high no biggie
What the fuck dude? Now it's a "who is this?" convo going back and forth. Like... helllloooo you just sent me a picture of your penis! I'm entitled to ask who the fuck it is. I can't verify an identity by a body part.
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