Why would I want to inherit a sex machine used by my grandma?
Say something about gay babies.
sometimes in life you just needs hand puppets
We did like every position then did it again this morning. Something about him being the little boy i used to make sand castles with just made it way hotter.
well done
So I've come to the conclusion that I would cry if I had an ugly baby.
My vagina is scared and excited at the same time. It might not be able to sleep tonight.
What?? I'm covered in blood at the hospital, I atleast deserve a pic of someones boobs
i am bringing shame upon my ancesors with my weak liver valhalla will never accept me
weekly advice from mom, "Drink vodka, it las hess calories"
I told her I was dressed as a gag reflex judge.....she won, literally hands down.
I just had to explain to a 5 year old why I had fuzzy handcuffs hidden in a macaroni box under my bed.
We had sex six times. In a span of 8 hours. Confirmation I don't need to go to the gym.
Who knew that showing someone your boobs would make them stop crying.
So hypothetically speaking.. say someone dropped their birth control pill in a hot bowl of soup, and it possibly disintegrated.. would it be just as useful?
Sunburned by dick at the nude beach. Bad. She tried to blow me. But. I. Just. Can't. Saddest day of my life.
Randomize
