If I die and they 'assume' it's natural causes, just go with it.
it's like i can feel the ghost of his dick still inside me
It went from "haha, this will be funny" to "full blown anime porn fetish"
You were shirtless with a cowboy hat in 15 degree weather then u shotgunned a can of mixed vegetable Progresso soup
I need a vacation from myself..this is duely noted after I tried giving myself a concussion last night
We were messing around at his place it was going fine until he said, "I'm going to cum, hand me the shot glass"
No I got myself stoned. With her bowl. She was just a casualty of the War on Sobriety.
I do have a life. It just consists of making scarves and chesse straws now
Does Jim keep sending you pics of him in drag too???? If so, are you also slightly uncomfortable?
You are the only lesbian I know that needs plan b
That moment when you realize the hot british guy named rory you drunkenly made out with at a bar is American, is named Tyler, and has a girlfriend.
I forgot a room to the key..so whenever you wake ip and read this...I'm sleeping inthe hallway..please find me
I just want to feed you taquitos and play with your boner and live happily ever after
No. I don't like you. I like your penis. Chin up. At least I like part of you.
Don't drink and try to take a shower. I thought I was drowning
Randomize
