I was mid-pee and he walked in, claimed he was looking for his phone, and then asked if we could hook up since we were finally alone.
so yall hooked up?
We played strip Bananagrams and I won. Thank fuck I read a lot as a child.
Last night was the first night with all of the roommates, and what started as a calm night of light drinking got out of hand. There's a girl on my couch wearing only a fanny pack.
the condom is still stuck, that's what I get for being responsible
I will never in my life forget you letting the cat lick your tongue
Didn't know hookah bars could end badly. I feel for her hair
Next time a party gets busted lets get a group photo first.
I just bought a bong from a hot dog stand.
Youre having a picnic
Yeah but all we have is vodka, so it's getting a bit out of hand.
Don't be alarmed when we finally get naked and I let out a WOOHOO!!!
I walked in on him pumping himself up by headbanging to the drumbeat from Jumanji.
I was so hungover at work I had my shirt on backwards. I had no idea how I managed to get through today puke free.
When you wake up to a porn star on your couch telling you, you better tell your boyfriend about last night.
I ditched my one night stand in the hotel lobby. How did he add me on Snapchat?
Made it to my hair appointment on time, and got some dick. Today is already a great day
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