Moms kinda upset I threw up in grandmas bedroom. I think ill stay in tonight.
i have wind burn on my face from my head hanging out the window of the cab vomitting
the theme of the baby shower is Nightmare On Prego Street
I think I left my camera at your house. It would be in both of our best interests if you don't go through the pics.
Remeber when I drunkenly made out with him this summer while he was getting bitched at by his girlfriend on the phone? Yeah, neither do I. But I'm pretty sure that same thing happened again last night.
Well, I didn't bring a notebook or any paper to class. Should I take notes on the sugar packet, lace thong, or condom wrapper that instead are in my school bag?
I wouldn't be surprised. You and I have basically synced up our brain chemistry by doing drugs together in the same way that two girls would sync their menstrual cycles by sharing a house.
Seriously. What did you do to me. You have a monstercoooooock.
I can't believe I just typed monstercoooooock. Twice.
We were so drunk that when I broke the bottom off a pint glass we decided to make it into a candle holder. How does that happen?!
So my parents just watched me pour their rum into a bottle and only add crystal light powder, no water... Talk about being judged. All I could say was "Cortland tricks?"
We got stuck in traffic in the tunnel while we were smoking weed. We were afraid to air out the car.
I'm gonna die. First I'm gonna throw up. But then I'm gonna die.
We need to get me chipped asap
Can I come over?
Sorry I gave up dick for lent. Hit me up on Good Friday tho
If he isn’t into CosPlay he will be after tonight. That naughty nurse outfit heals broken hearts
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