sexting on a treadmill. speed 9.0 beat that slut!
I wish you had a penis so you could experience peeing out the window in front of a crowd of people leaving parties.
Just when you think you're never going to have sex again, BOOM you're naked in bed with a guatemalan
Screw it. I'll show up in a white dress with a sign that says " I fucked the groom and it wasn't that great."
like when he blacked out and we found him in the garden eating your tomatoes off the vine
This is the most scared i've been of my hands since i did shrooms.
I let him do a line off my nipple in exchange for his prescription pain pills. I feel like 3/4 Vegas stripper, 1/4 underbelly of society.
she tied the funnel to the fucking ceiling...
His grandma held his dogs so they wouldn't follow me out the door. It was like a whole new level added to my walk of shame.
Why are there jello shots in the kitchen drawer?
True. So did you hook up with pasta or the ultimate warrior
Little bit of both
I think after 8 tries we can say Stoli Thursdays cause too much damage.
I need to sanitize my soul.
Tackling and headbutting friends, running away and hiding from everyone, attempting to streak across campus, and then waking up with no sign of a hangover... happy 21 to me
I woke up in a beaver hat and contruction vest.. I need answers.
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