question - sack: should she or should she not play with it during foreplay?
Helping a hot freshman girl move in = 2 hours of my life One bottle of cheap vodkas = $10 Watching her do the walk a shame on her first morning away from home = Priceless
I had it in my eyebrows, my bangs, under one eye, and across both cheeks. Congratulations on the successful and elusive warpaint cumshot.
It's official. Every single female in their late teens and early 20s get their fb statuses from a pool of cliched "quotes" which all say, without saying, "boys treat me like shit, I know they do, but one day I'll find 'the guy' who will treat me right no matter how psychotic I am." Vom.
were lost, were cold and we don't know what to do with the stray cat we found.
Wasn't a date. In exchange for artichoke dip I received a bj. And sex. It was a transaction.
You destroyed the landscape if my vagina FOREVER.
we left the music on while we were fucking. some kanye west song started playing and he started to cry
I am almost positive I asked to milk her when I was saying my goodbyes.
I just want a teacup pet pig so I can take him to parties with me and never have to walk home alone again.
This guy dressed as a piece of paper for Halloween, I felt it was only necessary to sign his penis
It was a frighteningly large penis to say the least
I’m gonna slowly take you in my mouth and push you deep into my throat so my lips are right up against your body and then I’m gonna fucking bite your shit off if one more of our friends shows me a snap you took while I was giving you head. Are we clear?
Setting myself up for trouble? Yes. But getting laid is a lot more important at this time.
According to the office gossip the new secretary is “a homewrecking whore”. Think I should spend $27 on a fake wedding ring?
Yes! Want that picture of you and my nephew?
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