I'm fascinated by her cleavage. She has deep cleavage, but no obvious boobage to speak of. Check it out.
I think my tv knows when im high and tells taco bell
Cuz last time you told me I was going to be shocked about something you got a hand job from a stripper in canada
Either call me back or tell me you're in jail. For fucks sake. If this is a cop, just help out. national league.
yeah they are definitely having sex in that car. joe just yelled through the window telling them to do the "titanic hand print thing"
We made a bet that we had to talk like Yoda all night at the bars
SURVIVAL MODE. WE CAN DO THIS. Celebratory survived-working-christmas-retail sex to follow
I feel like if you're funneling natty lights on a Wednesday at 2:30pm at the apartment complex pool during finals week, you probably don't have your priorities straight.
It's accurate though. I am legitimately passionate about pickles. I crave pickles the same way I crave sex. It is a deep rooted animalistic need
I still don't know his name but his ass is spectacular. Like he should never wear pants.
I'm at the gym. I've taken enough caffeine to feel inspired to be a low budget instagram fitness model. I totally forgot my push up bra though
Am i obligated to tell my sister her girlfriend was my one night stand three months ago?
If hypothetically I needed to puke on the bus... how would I go about doing this.
Dude, I just masturbated with my cat sleeping on my boobs....
You have GOT to get this crazy cat lady thing under control. I'm finding you a man. And you'll take him, and thank me. After that text, you have no right to be picky.
He cut off part of his middle finger playing the knife game while singing The Knife Game Song at the top of his lungs. He also scream like a girl when his finger hit the floor and he realized he fucked up.
Randomize
