That's when you crack a 10am beer
just fell over trying to sit on the toliet like a robot.
If you're ever in Seattle we should Fuck. Or get coffee, whatever.
He played with my vagina like it was a turntable
I just wished the taco bell drive thru guy a happy cinco de mayo. Who says arizonians hate mexicans?
I was peeing in the bathroom at this house party when a guy just casually stumbles out of the shower
this celing is unfamiliar to me... im just vaguely wondering where i am. but not quite concerned enough to do anything about it.
Something like that. Healthy diet of beer, ranch sunflower seeds and sex keeps me young.
The night got interesting when the random guy next to us handed us a bottle of champagne and the rest of his ciroc bottle. When we asked why he did it, he proceeded to point at his friend who face planted the floor.
So is that the only criterion for shenanigans now? Don't die?
You were silly, high, and chewing on things.
I see your boobs were ready to greet the new year.
he said "GREAT SCOTT" as he was cumming.
He stopped me mid-blow job to say that his new year's resolution was to stop hooking up. MID FUCKING BLOW JOB.
Never let the horse trainer ride you, always ride the horse trainer. I have huge bruises on my thighs from his hip bones. That's how hard he rode me
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