It's just like the Real World with babies
Fire inspection over. Blunts are OK
Real friends wouldn't let me shotgun a 4loko after already seeing me trying to eat a girl out through her jeans.
I don't know the quality of the hand jobs you've received in the past but it CLEARLY was not one from me
once you get past the part where you think youre gonna die, its the most amazing drug ive ever experienced.
I know it was you that I fucked last night... I can smell my disappointment all over the sheets
Daquari drive throughs 24 hours a day. LORD HAVE MERCY
It's times like this I miss having my nipples pinched
I threw up in the darkest corner of the bar last night, then watched 2 girls freak out in disgust after walking through it. I then realised I puked on the dancefloor, took a picture and proceeded to send it to my mom.
We smoked a huge blunt and then laid in bed naked eating strawberry shortcake good humor bars. We have the perfect relationship.
Do you know how fucking great a bath bomb is when you're high?
Imma make him fuck me with my jersey on tonight while I chant Go Jets Go. Gotta love playoff hockey szn.
Omg I got up from his bed and almost did a header into the wall because I came so many times I forgot how to walk.
I got a pots and pans set and a vibrator. Merry Crisis.
He passed out while I was riding him but stayed hard long enough for me to orgasm. He definitely earned the blow job I’m going to wake him up with in the morning!
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