Don't you send me to vm
your suggestions for charades were, getting sucked into an aircraft turbine, getting raped by a dolphin, and having sex with a vacuum cleaner. you got your own, and actually used a vacuum cleaner as a prop.
dont worry, it'll just be a conversation starter like "why did you get that pierced?" or "wow, i got arrested there too"
How do you get mayonnaise out of... well jesus it's everywhere, let's start with carpets
P.S, i don't recommend doing keg stands on top of vehicles.
He tried to cuddle with me after we hooked up and i just looked at him and said why are you still here?
I have bruises on the inside of my thighs from sliding down the stair case...thanks for encouraging that slut show
Think I pulled my pelvic muscle.
I think I pulled my ashamed of myself muscle.
Remember the bouncer that knocked out Dave and Sam? Apparently his day job is a florist. Uppercut and fresh cut in one package.
Oh ya, I forgot to tell you, last night I woke up to the sound of you peeing on the floor next to the fridge, didn't remember until now. Have fun at Dayton!
Well i would have gone to the bar but Satan decided to hold his rituals in my uterus.
I've decided that buying my first unused mattress has been my first major step into real adulthood.
Thursday is not a good day to become a felon... It's bingo night
I just had mom give me advice about how and where to store my lube in my shower. It was super awkward. Of course, she also walked in on me masturbating once so I guess turnabout is fair play
Just find a separated / divorcing man. They’re too upset to fall in love, too helpless to be alone and too horny to think straight. Smile at him the right way and he’ll be thrilled to be with a sexy younger woman!
Randomize
