He belongs with you like a mcdonalds playground belongs in Chernobyl
As a driver I hate pedestrians, and as a pedestrian I hate drivers, but no matter what the mode of transportation, I always hate cyclists.
you should buy a sheep. A) you get an awesome pet. B) free coat
I thought he was joking about the hundred beer challenge until two guys showed up with a camera and boom mic. This cabin party is going to be fucked
I woke up with glitter in my wounds.
Serious question...Is it possible to get a DUI on a kayak?
I have no idea, but there's a bus parked in front of my house and like 6 texts saying im gonna prove my love. this is either really really awesome or really really bad.
Imma do me. And by that, I mean I'm going to walk across campus still drunk at 9am on a Tuesday.
I thought my dog was a polar bear. I kept asking how the north pole was this time of year.
I have a hunch Mama J got around.
Am I allowed to say that about my own mom?
Using all my books as packing buffer for my liquor bottles. And you said being an English major was worthless.
Well I passed out before 4:20 on 4/20 so I deem it a failure AND a success.
How do you clean puke off a stuffed bear?
I swear I was in Legend of Zelda Twilight Princess and American Ninja Warrior at the same time. I'm never getting high while rock climbing again.
This friendship isnt goin to work if you dont respond to my drunk texts
Randomize
