Was just hit on by a guy with 2 kids and one was named Rocky. I need to get out of Buena Park.
The most interesting things happen to you when your pants come down. I truly envy you.
who paints a picture of their own dick and sends it to people. i dont know if its borderline crazy or just fucking genius...
Tonight will bring shame to my future grandchildren.
Let's not refer to him as Dustin. That makes him seek like a real person, not just a dick I would like to experience.
Of course it was necessary for me to call the strip club and ask what their shower policy is. Smelled like she was wiping her ass with my eyebrows during that dollar dance.
Id have to say flaming beer pong was a royal success.
Is it considered a bad morning to find your boss half naked in the parking lot of work at 7am?
That depends, how hot is your boss?
I'm drinking with a guy who apparently blew my dog sitter.
Oh my god the guy at DQ just gave me the number 69 and winked at me
Sex while Star Warsing is the best
she said she doesn't remember seeing me at all last night. ...I was with her for six hours, there's no way she could have been blackout the whole time
He ate me out while I was playing bejeweled. It was the greatest moment of my life.
He's here walking around DRUNK AS FUCK in a Kobe Bryant number 8 jersey... Tucked in.
hey can you come unlock the basement door? I'm trapped in here.
no I can't, you're a safety hazard. but, there's a beer keg down there somewhere. we don't have cups, but help yourself.
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