people and things i regret. that's what i want to do tonight.
Just burped. Tasted like beer and cherios...Beerios. This is gonna be quite a day.
How am I a tease?
Dude you flashed me ur vagina and walked away.
ONLY PART OF IT.
he just looked at me and whispered "these are my sea lions. my sea lions." and then went back to licking the mirror
I feel like banging her is an expected thing. But banging you would be like getting a 36 on the ACT.
The usual, im laying out. Ipod on shuffle, Large spray bottle to cool myself of and a smaller one filled with chilled vodka. I can spray the vodka right in my mouth without even opening my eyes. THIS IS LIVING....
Feel like I died but someone put me In a human microwave and I got back to life.
WHAT GOOD IS APPRECIATING IF NOBODY'S NAKED
I'm doing running of the bulls tomorrow at 7am...except in New Orleans roller derby girls chase you.
do you ever look at a card in your wallet and reminisce about all of the drugs youve done with it?
It doesn't count as "finding the lesbian" if you fuck a straight girl!
IT IS NICKEL SHIT NIGHT
*shot. Why
You made noises. And kept meowing. I have a twenty minute phone call to prove it.
I know you told me I shouldn't go see him...that's why I'm texting you letting you know I made it home safe from his house this morning
Okay so as of now, we may either be coming for one night, two nights, or not at all this weekend. It depends on Laura's toe and if I get my period. Will explain later
Randomize
