I bet i've been more pregnant than you.
i dont care about people's attitudes as long as they give me head
I'm 90% sure a girl here is wearing a bra strap as a headband.
It's a shame that I don't know his last name. Actually, it's an ever bigger shame that I don't know his first name
All i remember was he was wearing billibong pants... well actually my mom found that out for me.
You just want to fuck a girl in a dinosaur costume, don't you?
tell your freshman friends. will trade sexual favors for swipes. ive got dinner tomorrow open and lunch on wed
Morning yack off the fire escape. Girl walking by was mortified. Gooooooooo Ducks!!
I want to be you.
I feel like it'll be a success as long as she doesn't end up dead in a ditch. There has to be a line somewhere.
Should I have a moral quandary about Skyping topless with him while his son slept in the other room?
Getting free blow from a total stranger, who asked permission to stroke my eyebrows, was the highlight of my evening out. Also, I have a new cuddle dealer.
I just sneezed glitter I JUST SNEEZED G LITTER I j u st SneeZED GLIT TER I DO NOT HAVE TIME FOR THIS AT ALL.
Im playing a game I have to take a drink every time my gram asks me the same question hammered by 4 guaranteed...
so on a scale from morning glass of wine to that time i burnt the garage down how drunk were you last night
About 'lets tie a boat to a truck and ride it down the freeway'
I feel like I haven't slapped your ass in years. This will be awesome.
Randomize
