names aren't important. just tell him all you want is a lil make out sesh and keep it moving.
Took an aderol, wrote a differential equation for solving volume of flow of a rectangular channel with change in depth, then masturbated for the 6th time.
High as balls & about to be tanning. Helloooo 15 minute vacay.
I don't see why you're so upset, it's not like you were wearing pants either.
You don't forget tits like those, even if you are vegas drunk.
Fuckbuddy couldn't meet, so she's trying to find a substitute to come fuck me. Best. Fuckbuddy. Ever.
Her vagina smelt so bad I lied and told her that I was married just so that she would leave.
He had a 99.9% chance of getting laid...until he started cutting down the frat's volleyball nets with his pocket knife.
Drunk me needs to be reminded of my sexual preferences.
at least it wasnt animals
its before 9am and ive already had to dip my dick and balls in a glass of milk. probably isnt a good sign for how today is going to go.
Next time I think buying tan-thru bikinis is a good idea, remind me of that time I passed out in one and burned the epic shit out of my pussy.
When was that?
Yesterday. Bring aloe. For my pussy.
He got in a shopping cart outside of home depot and insisted we push him down a flight of stairs. For science.
Marrying her is the worst scenario of any. That includes death and zombies.
Oh my fucking god that cat looks just like you after you accidentally took Ketamine
don't let your emotions get tangled in that sexy beard of his.
Randomize
