i don't have parental supervision. i'm gonna start accepting candy from strangers now.
My sis friend said it was fake then described it as "scary"...greatest adj ever applied to my dick
non applicator tampons are so hard to put in when your drunk. i fingered myself for 10 minutes and forgot what i was trying to do.
are you going to last longer than 15 seconds
nope
i grabbed his hand and told him i loved him and then he looked down and said "i love...mallomars" and shoved like three in his mouth. never been so embarrassed.
You seriously looked at the house acorss the street and implied that you thought they had nice Easters.
He thinks that since we have been dating six months, that he can do the helicopter with his penis. Not okay.
as it turns out, there is no "i was in the pool" excuse for adderall-induced shrinkage.
no i had to finish in the bathroom to a pic of her mom in a bikini.
heres the thing, we have 120 cans of beer left in the fridge. until thats finished we cant fit food in the fridge
You emptied out your taco and asked the lady for a refill...and then you continued to carry out a full conversation SCREAMING
Apparently it is impossible to get kicked out of taco bell....I'll try harder next time
I think they took out their livers years ago and replaced them with like cheese graters or something. Only explanation.
Your lack of dedication to alcohol is forcing me to drink with my ex husband. U suck
You told us that you were going to become a 'new man' and threw your tv set out of a window.
I walked out ot my car in the morning thinking there was a sandwich I left there from yesterday. Then later that day I was checking the mail and saw the other side of my car :/
It concerns me the most that u were potentially going to eat a day old car sandwich.
Randomize
