Still waiting. He said he'd call between 2 and 10... apparently he's like the Comcast of drug dealers.
you busted in the room, ripped the covers off of us, ... and fist pumped
I'm celebrating tres de junio so if you can help me find some sombreros ill be grateful. Also, today in 1992 Aborigines were granted rights to their land so I might need some boomerangs.
It went from "haha, this will be funny" to "full blown anime porn fetish"
No, that was the night I was sneezing out barf
you kept telling her you'd make a great step-dad while cuddling her and rubbing her back...
It was huge And he was twirling it around. Im telling you, beautiful wonderpenis
He's going to let me keep his bowl in my car. Does that make us Facebook official?
I woke up on your bathroom floor, i used your towel I found laying on the floor as a cape to get to your bed. I thought it would help me walk straight if I looked like a superhero
Just did a relay race involving shotgunning beers, cannonballs and riding a blowup whale. Never want to leave vacation.
After she asked if she could try to fit her toe ring around it, i decided to leave. Thats the life i live
Eric was just sitting there open-mouthed swallowing sake from that squirt bottle for so long the lady across from us leaned over to her kid and told him not to end up like "the big alcoholic one"
You should've seen the look on the guys face when I demanded pho and a beer the second they opened. Obviously he doesn't understand hangovers
Dude I may be rolling but there's no way I can make up a 12 ft tall giant green man waving to me right now
False alarm, security just told me it's a radio tower
My penis is lonely
So is my ring finger
Randomize
