I don't want to talk about it. He was like the Little Engine that couldn't get me off.
I need to stop coming to work sober
My mom just walked in on me and my girlfriend about to have sex. All she said was "You're lookin like a fool with your pants on the ground.."
do you have any idea how expensive it is to have the munchies at Disneyland?
Well, you're either very drunk or very high but I'll let it slide because I love any type of conversation concerning cheese.
I'm going to get so drunk tonight, I actually feel bad about the 30 seconds of drunken awkward sex I'm going to have with one lucky fat chick.
So... on the count of three, we are going to forget last night ever happened... 1...2...3
The cop and I then joined forces to get you up off the sidewalk.
THEY HAVE VIAGRA FLAVORED GELATO
I just wanted to let u know that I called the taco people and informed them what the fuck is up.
So, settle a debate for my housemates. Have you measured your dick. And how long. Results Will not be disclosed
Thanks for coming out I think haley is drunk enough for breast milk White Russians
I forgot to tell you that he serenaded me with "Fuck Her Gently" by Tenacious D. And I didn't hate it.
Whiskey. Because sometimes it's fun to have your hands go numb.
I'm not going to tell you how to live your life, which includes naming your schlong
Randomize
