I'm eating all of the evidence.
Totally saw a hot amputee. I think this is called character growth.
the best part about being a teacher is there are always 20 little kids around me to blame my farts on
he looks like a really good dad on facebook
Just told the nurse I wouldn't get on the scale. Told her to write FAT.
When you get home we need to compare our schedules and set up masturbation slots. I'm scares of you walking in on me. Again.
I decided to have standards now that i've graduated. No guys without a bed frame.
I don't care if I just threw up. You kiss me now. This is marriage.
just watched a cripple ollie in his wheelchair to get on to the elevated floor in the bar. I. LOVE. WISCONSIN
Seriously your house is like the underground railroad for unwanted gay kids
I'm just trying to find the strength to put my bra back on and come inside
I just want to order a very large pizza and get very drunk and very laid.
I'm sharing a breakfast burrito w my uber driver
Like did he really think I just hit him up for dick !? It's 11:30 am , these ain't hoe hours
She made me undress her with my teeth...explains the button in my shit this morning...
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