So I think we're almost at the age where we should start calling boys men. Now what age do they start living up to the new title?
Most never. Some around 65.
Okay you totally passed out. Ask me about the bike parking garage and the expired baby formula in the morning.
time for a it's-monday-night-and-this-week-is-gunna-suck-drink.
We found her hiding in the bath tub.. And when i opened the curtain she replied "thank you" and walked out like nothing happened.
Think I can pull off edward 40 hands before class?
You might end up in the wrong class.
I'm a COM major, they're all the wrong class.
The pool of urine in the trash can signifies both a regretful yet successful night.
Aaaaaaand, there's the title of my second book. "One Dick. Six Angles."
Well thank god i want six autographed copies
Doug will be the one to get my vagina. I don't know when or how but I'm now declaring that it is his. And he better not disappoint.
The Wolf of Wall Street “I ain’t fuckin’ leaving!” speech when the cops broke up your party though...
I just want to have sex and eat dumplings. Is that so much to ask?
I don't blame you. I made YouTube videos of me singing Rent songs then slept with a married couple. Fucking tequila.
You told everyone to shut up then told the officer that you are 21 when you drink.
I just got the high sucked out of me. Fuck.
Is there any reason why a taxidermic donkey head is in the shower?
How’s big weiner McGee?
I’m going to ask you one last time to call him Matt and he’s fine thank you very much
Randomize
