I may or may not have just irish jigged at a bar. And broken out in a sweat from it. Not a good sign for that marathon yo.
any plan I had today of being a productive member of society, I am officially throwing out the window.
I am the drunkest girl in the tree.
Your cat is quite the conversationalist after some tequila and shrooms
I just realized I'm trading you a pregnancy test for the morning after pill...
It's been a bad semester.
just go where the car takes you. fingers crossed its here with breakfast.
Drunk me wrote a bucket list last night. #4 is "hate fuck a childhood enemy". Can we make this happen?
For sure. Gotta go. Building an igloo.
I really dont wanna go to a traffic light party. I have nothing red to pretend I'm taken with. Without something red my "my girlfriend is away in the mines" story wont work.
Do you think there are two dudes living in an apartment somewhere that go to the store and call it Brocery shopping?
Oh god...probably.
well i don't NEED my liver but it's nice to have one when you're trying to have a good time
You're the only person not starstruck by him
Yes. That tends to happen after you regularly lick someone's balls.
i gotta stop hooking up with people just to get to their dogs
So after the absinthe shots_____(fill in the blank area for me please)......
I'm really busy with my period
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