bang him and never speak to him again. also, queef in his face.
i dont this its possible to queef on command.
Dude ur right that IS what a vagina looks like!
Do everybody a favor and GET LAID MORE.
You need to get here now. A drunk girl just stumbled into our apartment. shes laying on the floor by our door.
i cant remember past the part when we filled his tub with skittles.
FYI I'm about to upload a vid of you to facebook of you screaming "SNACK ATTACK" and throwing cheetos at everyone playing pong...
We ended up getting arrested after we flagged down the cops for a ride home with open beers in our hands... turns out the "nobody told me" excuse doesn't cut it anymore
I'm still tasting pancake mix. I think this may actually be a serious medical problem...
I spent a good part of the night in a bear hat claiming I'd changed spieces
I should not be this drunk in a place where a girl is wearing a princess dress
If I could steal your goatee and hide it under my bed to keep your from wearing it, I would.
I got a lap dance last night from a girl while I was wearing a Captian America onsie. My life does not suck.
I remember yelling at him telling him that the strippers were "nice people."
I'm kind of pissed I'm not hungover, that means I could have totally drank more last night.
You planned on giving him head in the shower?
More like I just fell and it seemed like a good idea when I was down there
He was a Cher impersonator. They are the draggest of queens
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