ps... at the end of one of the videos you yell "let's do the eiffel tower again.. i'll be in the middle!" .. i almost died lolol
She turned over and said "You smell like my dad, i just can't do this"
Taking jello shots out of a big bowl from a measuring spoon. holla atcha boy.
I can hear her moaning. I'm on some random guy's counter. He wanted me to cuddle but I said I didn't know how.
you called me in the middle of the night, wandering the streets, in search of "the ultimate burrito"
Nothing sez sunday morning like waking up in a phonebooth with a leg cramp.
why would you automatically assume i'm high...
you just told me you're eating the powder of a lemonade mix.
I'm laying in bed with a case of beer,.. That's how this break up is going..
I imagine it like the scene in Sorceror's Stone, but instead of flying keys, it's flying dicks.
That is a dream.
McDonald's and a car nap. I feel kinda human
I wonder how long it will take her to realize that I peed in her night stand.
Now we just need to figure out why your underwear was in your bra
Dad is wasting no time getting back out there. Just walked in on him and a Twin Peaks waitress in the hot tub
Heard about your divorce. Let me know if I can do anything for you or your penis ;-)
Her hand jobs are magic. They smell like vanilla and awesomeness. She made me forget how to walk
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