just tell him i said nine months
Feel like bed is flying. Not sure where we're going. Hope there is candy.
I think I'm pregnant with his hipster baby. It keeps kicking my stomach to the beat of mgmt songs.
me neither. i remember bell pepper tequila but not why or yelling
Hahaha, I forgot about doing shots out of the bell pepper
I paid some man $10 for his shirt last night cause I liked it. Explains that. Bought the jackolope head from a street vendor. Got invited to someone's hotel rooftop swimming pool which explains why I was in my bathing suit. My clothes from last night are MIA. Going over the border with no pants on is awkward. Origins of the car rim still mysterious.
Fact: Chilis at the airport in JAX will serve you shots of jack at 6:45 with breakfast. Ya I missed my flight.
So when does your new flight leave?
At my shot/hour ratio.... I leave in 16 shots. I love flying
He has in a pan: ten pieces of bacon, two cloves of garlic, an egg (not scrambled or hard boiled, just an egg) and frozen corn.
I'm eating the rest of the Xmas shrooms and welcoming 2012 by communing with the pine cone.
I. Put. Them. Back. We are NOT making a habit of jail visits.
Oh my god. I'm not ready to be an adult. I'm not ready.
You were so calm and collected as you strolled out the door with 40 mcdonalds cups in your arms. It was legendary.
Did you drink ALL that 151??
No. We drank all the jaeger... Then used the 151 to start the fire. We're also out of paper towels... And your hairspray is flammable.
got some info she was last seen with some guy wearing goggles
You better have a raging boner when I get to your house and it better be worth missing work in the morning.
I was stuffing my face while buying a brownie and coffee and some kid I fucked came up behind me and said. Someone's hungry.
Randomize
