let me know it goes. try not to get bit. and if you can, get someone to videotape it.
then he pulled down his pants, and i just stared for about a minute..... i was so confused. i didnt know my cat could have a bigger penis than an 18 year old man.
Speaking of morons, I just found half a Subway sandwich in the bathroom drawer You or your brother?
and somewhere between crying in her arms and throwing up in her front yard, we became friends.
He did leave his bud tall boy and 2 choco tacos, so not a total loss.
Well, it's a fine line between people-watching and boob-staring. It's a gray area. But we're in Paris. Let's leave it at that.
The fact that it neither of us came up with the reason of "it's morally and ethically wrong" speaks volumes about this relationship
This guy kept trying to use "see? I'm clean. Cleared by the plasma place today." as a pick up line. This is not okay.
Apparently, the Mormons have taken over airports. I was told by a befuddled looking clerk I couldn't buy a beer with breakfast before 6am.
I'll only sleep there if we can bone on your balcony.
No. We can't get pedicures until my toenails grow back.
Can you tell dad to stop liking and sharing porn on FB again?
I was amazing, unlike anything he's ever experienced. I somehow made him feel young and old.and he never felt old before. He feels I will literally kill him. With my magic, lethal vagina.
Ugh. All the good hoes are in their third trimester.
If I wanna spend the whole night tied up and getting railed I'm allowed to do so
Randomize
