3:47a: I take it you're not on your way over
You feel like going out tonight?
Does a 14yr-old girl look good beat up? I'll bring the handle
So my shaver died while I was trimming...ya know. And now it is half way done. I don't think there's currently any aesthetic in keeping it this way...
I changed my mind about Tim Gunn. I like him now. Mostly because he said someone's dress looks like a gay t-rex. Or something.
I was so high I couldn't tell if they were goosebumps or herpes.
I just opened a bunch of old flavored condoms just to see what they tasted like.
He looks like he has a penis
What the fuck
A good one, a good penis
It reminded me of the time my mother gave my Bailey's in my stocking when I was 14.
I feel as if the hash cupcakes on top of mushroom chocolates was a little excessive last night
I thought we were but then I freaked myself out. So I kind of geared him up for take off and then cancelled the launch
Me and Jason had to grab your legs and arms and drag you in the house. You kept screaming "leave me for dead"
She showed up after 3 hours and proceded to make us all feel like resonable human beings. I dont know how she did it but she did it.
You made out with both twins? Ten points to you!
Only time and a comprehensive case study of all of your relationships will tell.
Remember how I was complaining about how no guy has ever gotten me off?
Randomize
