break up sex still means we will always be broken up.
her dad is making me watch Glen Beck, i only agreed because i penetrated his daughter earlier.
I just withdrew $200 in ones. I think the teller knew what was up
Yes, I am watching The Hills Have Thighs. And yes it is a porno remake of The Hills Have Eyes. And, again, yes, lesbian sex in the desert. Get the sand out.
You better of fucked him last night or do it now because he is buying all the roommates McDonald's.
I'm gonna win the lottery and buy chinchillas and tattoos for everyone
then you said,"Take this damn cabbage!" although it was actually your shirt. i found you in the elevator of his building.
Because its Monday... And I'm determined to just be drunk for the rest of the semester
I think I was the only one who knew you were acting like you weren't drunk in public issues discussion this morning. Make sure you thank me in your Academy Award Speech someday.
I feel like they've probably fucked. Like.. you don't just bring a bitch a Big Mac if you haven't fucked her.
Totally had a conversation drunk last night with a bisexual chick at my apartment in Spanglish too.
You're a hero.
My ex's new girlfriends ex boyfriend is getting me my nipples pierced for Valentine's Day so who's the real winner here
I don't think it counts as a booty call at 6:30 pm.
I put on a tiger onsie to initiate sex... It worked
Soooo, hypothetically, how long would roommates have to sleep together before its considered dating...
Randomize
