Got a little crazy huh? Happy st pattys day. None of you have any idea where my credit card would be do you? How do i always lose
Sometimes I wonder if we could be friends if we lived closer.
dude, mark had the least successful cab ride in history last night. took a cab to the bars, stopped at every atm in the city, none worked, then had to come back to the party to beg for 20 to pay the taxi that officially took him nowhere.
i turned job hunting into a drinking game..
No I'm not okay I had a crush on the singer of Tokio Hotel for four months and now you tell me he's a dude?
Ok. Also I almost just threw up. Seriously. I was think to myself "really? Here? Now? At my work desk?" and then it went away.
Is it bad that I had sex with another guy on my boyfriend's bed while he's out of town?
Just flip the mattress, it erases all
Done and done
All he wants to do is masturbate while I sit there with my big toe up his ass that is not even the worst part of it.
I remember doing shots of gin, then I have this strange memory of us making out in the womens room at waffle house.
I regret none of it.
Getting robbed by hookers is def a right of passage in a mans life
I think he might be using me for sex. I also think I might be ok with that.
I don't want my vagina anymore.
My neighbor came out@4am in a pink nite gown n clotheslined a punk on a mo-ped w/her mop handle, then just walked back in her house like she just checked the mail. MILF 1 PUNK 0
OMG I accidentally abducted a cat. Now there is a cat in my apartment. I NEED TO UNDO WHAT I HAVE DONE
i black out too much to be "responsible"
Randomize
