I think we should see other people.
Already working on it.
I told him he was my first gentile. He was so flattered.
I remember seeing LSAT prep books and thinking "Whose room is this? I should be hooking up with them instead."
Only I could do what I did last night and feel perfectly ok working around children the next day
who has not yet felt my sugrcially enhanced boobs. HurryI am at the bnar and it is 1:15 am
Currently emptying half-full wine bottles from fridge into my mouth and refilling with water for later. Drunk survivalist recycling!
I have never heard someone not give a fuck so poetically in my life. I feel like you should be leading men into battle with a speech like that
there is no excuse for drinking mascato in your room alone while listening to one-hit wonders from the 90s
We fucked on shrooms. It's like his dick was a beam of light and when I came I turned into a prism and my orgasms were made of rainbows.
Officially conquered sex on my couch with my dad asleep in the next room
I like how you say "conquered" as if that was your sole mission in life
Yeah, I'm just gonna try to repress that and remember him for his big dick and perfect jawline.
bought a large fruitopia from McDonalds at 7:45 this morning. Spilled it on the ground. Cried. THAT hungover.
I can see their wedding vows now: 'Til basicness do us part
Listen, I booty called my boss last night from the company phone. I may need to brush up my resume.
yeah, i'm probably gonna die. still gonna be totally worth it tho
Randomize
