You think ghandi was good in the sack? cuz i sure do.
I'm not gay.
Soooo you want ghandi? is that what your telling me?
If ghandi gives good head...I'm in
Its fine.
If this week is any indication of my life here I've got to get out ASAP. My liver can't hack it.
I will always remember today as the day I narrowly escaped having to touch a tiny penis
I would convert to being a Republican and Mormon just to sleep with Romney's sons. The things I would to do them.
I am pretty damn sure that neither my body or his body is ready for how drunk I am getting tonight
Waiting to interview and found a beer in my purse from last night
Well it's like a wise man once told me: "If you're going to shave your balls, don't do it hungover."
That Kevin guy is something else...His penis is fucking glorious. And he has a way with words. If he lived here I'd be the conductor of the fuck caboose. I mean literally I would never want to get off that thing.
I don't care who you bring as long as they are fun and not a cop
We just got busted fucking in the hammock by his roommate...I'm so out of here as soon as hes asleep....
I just need to get a little drunker before I realize I'm not straight
He sent me a meme at 3am. Usually guys just send me booty calls that late. I think I'm in love
WTF ARE YOU DOING IT'S FUCKING VEGAN COFFEE IT'S MADE WITH NUT MILK YOU'RE NOT A FUCKING SQUIRREL.
I'm not drunk or hungover and I don't have to work. My body is sooo confused!
At some point you said you just wanted to get laid, so we had a moment of silence for your dead sex life...
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