Just role played anchorman. And yes, I did take her to pleasure town.
I bought the tickets, he brought the weed. thanks to you, we had to roll a joint out of my bible paper.
I'm going to have to call in sick tomorrow. After this weekend, there's no way I can handle hearing the accountants talk about double entry without puking.
I woke up to his little sister feeling me up. I guess it's time to meet the family.
its family weekend so i'm givin my little bro a tour of everywhere ive thrown up on campus
I got called a drunken housewife today in class. I'm proud, not many people can say they've achieved their life goals like I have by the time they turn 20
Yeah dude. They were so drunk they actually drank the pool water. Which I'm pretty sure will kill them. My parents chlorine the shit out of that thing cuz they know how much sex my brothers have in it
Don't underestimate her when she starts going by "the vodka queen"
Did you seduce any young men into coming home to your love nest of poutine and jäger bombs?
Invited the whole bar back to my place for an after party.....shit got real with everyone seeing dad drink moonshine like a champ.
just saw a sign in the bar that says "no more naked fridays". Where the fuck was I on these naked fridays?
I think I just pulled an onion peel off my boob from sleeping on their kitchen floor
if you're the one who put those dollar bills in my bra last night, thank you because I just used that money to get myself a coffee
DUDE NEVER CALL THE COPS BACK
I can see. My condolences to your vagina.
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