Going to bed naked. Too bad I am all alone. Need to make some changes. Either sleep with clothes or with you
Come over? It's my birthday
How many times has that text failed you tonight?
Coffee is gods way of saying go ahead, get absolutly trashed on weeknights, I got your back
her idea of "friends with benefits" is her doing my laundry. i'm cool with it.
his grandma walked in on us. twice. and he was truly fucking surprised when i put my pants back on.
I just realized how early it is, you're taking this booty call thing to a whole other level. also, there are altoids all over my room, that was weird
She blew me in the back of the cab while eye of the tiger was on the radio. Top five all time automatically
I decided tomorrow is going to be great day wether my period likes it or not
You were in your third change of clothes, and I found you in my driveway passed out with my dog's food bowl. You win.
We may have picked the wrong resort. Brenna and I have already been propositioned for swinging twice and we've only been here 3 hours
I gather from Facebook you got drunk last night and took semi naked pictures of yourself?
You ninja crawled over five sleeping guys to get in my room at 6 in the morning to wake me up for sex
...and I think that may just be my favorite moment in our fuckbuddyship
I just had to explain to an 70+ year old lady what 'coitus' was. This was not in my job description.
Last thing I remember at your house last night is your dad leaning on the beer pong table and saying "you guys can fucking party"
What did you give up for lent?
Diet and excersize. And I'm never going back...
Randomize
