You would get kicked out of the study lounge for being drunk the monday of finals week
When he came he kept saying "oh god oh god" and he sounded just like his dad. awkward...
I kindof just wanted to go downstairs and let his dad know how good his son was at sex
you told that cab driver that when the 3 of us come togehter it means happiness and love
Just puked off the 5th floor onto a car windshield. This is my life and I'm proud of it.
Hopefully my orange shoes will distract people's attention from my crippling awkwardness
C'mon pople!!! THursday afternoon isnot gonna drinkin itself!!!
Jesus Christ that hit just spoke to so many levels of my soul. It's caressing them softly
I masturbated to my balding thirty-something co-worker last night. I am a new level of lonely.
and everyone will high five me and girls will approach me offering blowjobs
But seriously. What possible excuse could I come up with to ditch my parents on Christmas to go fuck him?
Three months into our sexual relationship, he comes out with "Your body is efficient". WTF do I do with THAT?
some people waaaaait a lifetime for a hookuppp like this some people seeeearch forever for that one special handjobbb
When a guy invites you to dinner and breakfast the next day it's implied that he's going to make some sweet loving in betwixt correct?
excused from jury duty. THAT hungover...
Randomize
