I FOUND THE PROF I'M GOING TO FUCKKKK.
don't ever try to run hungover. just puked mid-run in front of an old couple that were going for a walk. they were horrified.
Just took a celebratory "i havent slept with anyone in this bar" shot. yesssss....
This is random, but did i give u a handjob in the middle of the night or was that a dream?
How do the people at CVS not know your living in their bathroom?
her boyfriend dumped her for my exgirlfriend. so filming our hookup is pretty much a definite.
i was super drunk. to the point where i was putting shredded cheese on a fork, putting hot sauce on it then dipping it in salsa. it was awesome.
Leave it to us to have a family reunion in a bar bathroom
And the best part is I don't remember putting the condom in my pocket! Angels officially exist
For Valentine's Day I've purchased six lighters and I'm decorating them for him. I'm on a full ride to an art school and this is what I'm using my talents for. An intervention is needed. Please stop letting me date stoners.
He sent me a pic of her engagement ring and then STILL asked for nudes.
I can't hang out tomorrow. A boy wants to feed me ice cream and touch my boobs. Priorities.
did you just try to prove your straightness by quoting a lady gaga song?
He says the sweetest things but also that he wants to choke me when we fuck so it's kinda perfect.
He was tied up with the electrical tape and force fed wine from a box. It was never going to end well.
Randomize
