WHY CAN'T YOU EVER SHIT LIKE A NORMAL PERSON, JESSE.
remember them days when you seriously wanted your mom to marry rev run and we would always talk shit about justine?
joeyyyy why you always taken cheeseburgers from me?!?!?!
He just compared himself to a majestic butterfly in regards to the lack of girlfriends. i don't even know what to say.
what is it with giant penises always finding me
My knee is bleeding. This cheeseburger is the 3rd thing I made out with today and I think I got a job with the ducks. Catalina is poppin
I was in the library and saw 2 dudes hackysacking in a study room with 3 girls working. I asked if I could join; as soon as I closed the door the chicks offered me tequila shots. study session w/everyone cancelled, I'm busy.
I shit you not, me and my date were in that bar and within a 10 minute window, 4 ex gf's entered. Every one clocked me and gave me evils. I swear they're conspiring.
want to know what my life has come to? I just took a 45 min shower banging on the walls and making loud sex noises so my neighbors think I get some.
Your mother liked my album on facebook that's only filled with drunk pictures. I don't know what to feel about this
A beef tasting is not what I needed while hungover
The man was doing everything in his power to get away from his wife, including go into the gay club.
There's nothing classy about a pregnant girl at a frat party...remember that.
Just walked out of the train bathroom after having sex and got a round of applause from the passengers. Definitely the best part of the trip.
I feel like I'm in a astronaut outfit like I'm a spaceman & I'm just floating around cause that's all you do in space is float and I'm floating to be in detail
Houston we have a problem
You let the ASEXUAL teach sex Ed?!
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