Now I know how you felt every time you had to listen to me have sex with a girl... mildly disguested yet marginally proud.
good luck with ur interview. Just show them your confidence and don't make that sucking snot noise. Really don't. Praying for you, love mom
Great. I get laid, Leslie Nielsen dies. I can't have have sex anymore, the film community can't take another loss like this.
Just when I think I'm the one with the problem, I get home for the holidays and the family shows me what alcoholism is really about
i'm already feeling the tequila hangover i'm going to have on friday
He wore my sunglasses on his honeymoon..... so there's that.
Putting a positive pregnancy test next to my condoms in my drawer so I remember why I always need to use condoms
I'm doing laundry from this weekend.. That poor shirt I wore to the rave smells like a dead animal that rolled in weed and pain..
I feel like there should be a database and you screen your boyfriend's scrotum and all the fucked up shit they've done goes on file.
She needs to go. She is like the Yoko Ono of our group.
Had sex with the Irish bartender in Spain. So that happened.
I want to buy weed from this guy on Tinder but I'm not sure I should trust him...but it's free delivery
WHY HAVE SO MANY THING GONE IN MY BUTT ON THIS TRIP
I tried to text you about going to the Lion's Den but sent it to my boss. She was down for it. Please advise.
not only did he puke in his mouth and hold it.. He also sneezed while doing this
Randomize
