I just passed one of the bars and saw my mom kissing another woman. This can't be good....right?
Knowing your life, probably not.
She's hot and she went to Notre Dame. I want to fuck the Catholic right out of her
every time you feel disappointed with the red wings take a shot
Ok so serious question: if one wanted to say the plural of mongoose, would it be mongooses or mongeese?
but really, i care about skinny girls as much as michael vick cares about rotweilers
When he was fingering me, it felt/looked like he was digging around for pocket change.
I love the progression of these pictures. I go from cute to Courtney Love
My family is watching Intervention and taking notes. I need to leave NOW!
You are colorful like whore, yet adorable, like sad puppy. You need more drink.
I automatically know you're drunk now as soon as you start yelling in spanish
Nah. And this is true. It's like you were trained by sexual Jedi or something.
*jedi wave* this is the penis you were looking for
She can't brag about all the anal sex she has and then expect me not to awkwardly stare at her boyfriend when she brings him around
You know I'm having a rough day when I'm curled up in the corner eating Spaghettios.
Yeah I was thinking something along the lines of "I almost died, lets celebrate with sex. Come over"
So I crawled off the trampoline to puke in the neighbors yard. Wonderful house guest right here
Randomize
