can't decide if i want to get drunk or coked for this harry potter thing.. it is kind of long
aren't you going with children?
he told me he once ran a blackmarket liquor store out of his house. thats all it took for me to go home with him
That glade motion activator thing keeps going off every time we pass the bong. I don't know what I'm getting high off right now.
For the love of God you used a 40 foot extension cord to bungee jump out the off the 2 nd floor
I just ate four packages of Swiss Rolls. Being high and on food stamps is AHmazing.
Only I can have a panic attack in the back seat of a cop car and have them move me to the front seat.
How do I tell my child he was conceived on a barstool in South Alabama?
I'm eating Doritos that I crushed up n put in a cup so I only have to chill minimally.
It's amazing to think about how many Obama victory sex babies are being prevented by Obamacare free contraception.
She is so graceful and lady-like, like a swan... On meth
Fucking shoot me with this y'all shit. You were in Texas for 2months you do not have an accent Madonna
We can get drunk and battle coyotes
No i dont need a babysitter i have my cats. Cats can dial 911 ya know
Umm... When he walked in I shot him with my confetti gun... It's a wonder my booty calls even show up.
whenever dudes said you had nice tits you'd scream at them "This double push-up bra is full of deceit and lies!"
Randomize
