Have you finally orgasmed yet?
We succumbed to passion, and then he had to go meet his girlfriend. End of story.
I know she was blacked out, but she looked directly at the toilet and said "we meet again"
Spent 200 bucks on a stripper for a good night hug. I give up.
I just went to pick up my pigeon from your house. You should be getting a picture soon
He took shrooms and didn't want anyone to touch him. He kept saying he was a chip and he didn't want to break.
You know me. im down for anything that could harm my well being. lets dress like dolphins so everyone will see what dicks they are.
I'm concerned I'll look like a hooker on new years eve in this outfit
There are different standards on new years eve. To look like a hooker you literally need to be giving a guy head on the street while he's handing you cash.
I feel like we should at least be hungover if we're gonna be this grown up.
Whatever it's Canadian jail, it's not like Guatemala or something. It'll be nice and cushy and they'll probably throw him a big bday party with all his friends and strippers
When we were finished I asked him how long it had been since he'd cum that hard. He thought really hard for a while before telling me his brain forgot how years worked.
Don't stress. That was a joke. I'd trust my pets with no one else. Accidents happen. Sometimes things go smoothly when you help a neighbor out and sometimes you electrocute their fish. Life is funny that way.
Hooking up with him was lovely.. but waking up in his bed the next morning and finding double stuffed oreos... I mean.... I won
Who put the meatball sub on my door handle?
It has now been 10 days since we last saw Sebastians penis
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