wat bout pragnant strippers??
I might get fired at work today. I had to prioritize. It's not my fault Cockasaurus came over.
STOP acting like a freshman, you have a drivers liscence now AND a PERSCRIPTION for birth control. Dont give all sophmores a bad name. Woman Up
1. my parents still have sex. 2. being a screamer runs in the family. 3. so much so that i can tell what number of orgasms she's on. 4.so looks like i'm stuck outside a while
Well, let me tell you, it was the most vivid sex dream I've ever had. More so than the Paris Hilton one I had in 05. And about as weird.
hotel security told us you walked into the hotel with blood all over your dress, weren't wearing any underwear and were escorted back by three men who were believed to be "homosexuals".
Do Not. I repeat. DO NOT DRINK WHISKEY TO COPE. You will end up in jail. LEARN FROM THE PRO
I've decided that my night was probably over when I started eating the penne vodka with my hands.
She sucks. And I almost hooked up with a clown last night
Ive never seen one person more proud of themselves of peeing in public and getting away with it.
You really could become the cat lady we've always dreamed of.
he's dressing as a chick for halloween. of course i'm gonna make him get his legs professionally waxed. how is this even a question?
I shaved my balls for you. Do you have any idea how hard that is?
We were like one big happy Eskimo family.
I’m not lawful evil! I do evil things because I want to, not because of the law
Randomize
