I just saw grafitti that read "Mug The Fart Eater". Really, Memphis? That's all you've got?
Myspace is for pedophiles and tweakers in the 818 trying to hook up. I always forget theres music there too
doctor said mango vodka does not count as my daily servings of fruit. damn.
We found a swing set....it's in the front yard.
Yeah, I wouldn't mind getting fingered in the corner of a dive bar again.
You need to get over here. I think the drunks are about to sacrifice a chicken to the beer gods. Or a freshman. Stay tuned.
Dear future Eric, sorry about the Everclear. Sincerely, Eric +2 shots E.C.
I approve. Last time I was there, I left E's room to get a drink of water. Found M sitting on the kitchen counter in his boxers hammered and eating a banana. He proceeded to feed me the rest of his banana then went to bed with the lights on. You two will be great.
It's not that I even wanna fuck these guys anymore, just cuddle that's all. My conscience has never been so proud.
I would have cried, probably tears of wine, but cried nonetheless.
Just got arrested in my crocs and rolled up pants with a mr rogers sweater for literally fucking nothing can u come get me?
P.S. If you wake up before noon it still counts as morning sex
Who the fuck stole my fridge again
My vibrator turned on under my pillow when I was taking a nap this morning... I nearly shit my pants.
His mom knocked on the door during morning sex because we were being too loud...now i have to meet her for the first time
Randomize
